fakedick:

Hey, if you accidentally call a guy “daddy” in conversation, just save yourself by adding “-o” to the end and slick your hair back like a 1950’s greaser. And throw on your sick-ass leather jacket

Your thirst is hidden and now you’re the coolest dude in school

deductivereasonable:

h34rken:

put a fucking bag on your head and sleep you god damn piece of shit

take a nap on a fucking ski lift

deductivereasonable:

h34rken:

put a fucking bag on your head and sleep you god damn piece of shit

take a nap on a fucking ski lift

noire-pandora:

I am that type of douchebag friend who doesn’t talk with you for weeks but still cares about you and hopes you still care too.

toocooltobehipster:

garbagelover666:

boyexemplified:

yeahnodudehella:

Masculinity is so fragile.

MAN CAVE STRONG! PROTECT FAMILY, DEPENDABLE FISHING!!!

COMPASSIONATE SPORTS!!!! ELECTRONIC FATHER


PROTECT FAMILY

toocooltobehipster:

garbagelover666:

boyexemplified:

yeahnodudehella:

Masculinity is so fragile.

MAN CAVE STRONG! PROTECT FAMILY, DEPENDABLE FISHING!!!

COMPASSIONATE SPORTS!!!! ELECTRONIC FATHER

PROTECT FAMILY

crystallized-teardrops:

when my mum goes ’ do you remember when you were little..’ NOPE NOPE NO MUM I DONT REMEMBER I DONT REMEMBER THOSE DAYS WHEN I HAD A BOWL CUT NOPE NOT IN MY MEMORY ABORT NOW

busket:

sixpenceee:

God forbid we teach the children psychology !!!

i wish the devil would have taught me all this and i wouldn’t have to pay for college

busket:

sixpenceee:

God forbid we teach the children psychology !!!

i wish the devil would have taught me all this and i wouldn’t have to pay for college

herestothegirlthatwreckedmyworld:

wellisnthatwizard:

hohenheiny:

YOU GUYS
SO I ACTUALLY DID THIS A FEW MONTHS AGO AND I DIDNT EVEN THINK THEY LOOKED AT THIS SORT OF THING SO BY THE TIME THE DELIVERY MAN CAME I HAD FORGOTTEN THAT I WROTE THAT AND THE GUY WAS REALLY CUTE. WHEN I OPENED THE DOOR HE WAS SUPER FLUSTERED AND DROPPED HIS PEN, THE BAG HOLDING THE PIZZA AND THE RECEIPTS. THEN after i signed the receipt and he was getting ready to leAVEEEE HE GOES “So… umm… did you actually put that?” and i was like “put what?” and he goes “… to.. um… tell you.. um that you’re pretty” omg it hit me that this was why he was all nervous and i started cracking up omfg then he told me that i was pretty.
ahhh pizza

i did this once but when the guy came to the door I sent my friend Martin to get the pizza and I heard muffled laughter and then Martin came back into the room with the pizza and whispered “he told me I was pretty”

Omg

herestothegirlthatwreckedmyworld:

wellisnthatwizard:

hohenheiny:

YOU GUYS

SO I ACTUALLY DID THIS A FEW MONTHS AGO AND I DIDNT EVEN THINK THEY LOOKED AT THIS SORT OF THING SO BY THE TIME THE DELIVERY MAN CAME I HAD FORGOTTEN THAT I WROTE THAT AND THE GUY WAS REALLY CUTE. WHEN I OPENED THE DOOR HE WAS SUPER FLUSTERED AND DROPPED HIS PEN, THE BAG HOLDING THE PIZZA AND THE RECEIPTS. THEN after i signed the receipt and he was getting ready to leAVEEEE HE GOES “So… umm… did you actually put that?” and i was like “put what?” and he goes “… to.. um… tell you.. um that you’re pretty” omg it hit me that this was why he was all nervous and i started cracking up omfg then he told me that i was pretty.

ahhh pizza

i did this once but when the guy came to the door I sent my friend Martin to get the pizza and I heard muffled laughter and then Martin came back into the room with the pizza and whispered “he told me I was pretty”

Omg

(Source: kallesdemos)